"Happiness is a state of activity." – Aristotle
Are you at a crossroads, needing to make a decision, but not seeming to be able to make the decision?
Maybe you're looking "to be saved" or "to be given an answer"? It doesn't really work like that. If your goal is to be a more confident, powerful person, then "being saved' doesn't really fit into that schema. You have to be your own savior, you have to do your own saving. This isn't to say that Life won't assist you, but you can't really say "Well this is what I need, what I want and I should get it." What you can say is, "I'm doing the best that I can based upon my own inner awareness. If I need to see more of myself — then show me. That said, I am doing my best and working with the results."
So how to make those decisions that you seem caught between making…
First, let's divide the decision up into your various choices. Maybe you have two, maybe three, maybe four, etc.
Then let's look at one side and answer: "What would I be losing if I made this choice?" After you have listed everything on the physical plane, then answer "What illusions would I be losing if I chose this decision?" Your illusions are one of the last things you will ever want to give up. Is it an illusion that you are disempowered? Is it an illusion that you are self-reliant? Do some real thought work on this.
Is it the illusion that you are less connected to your family than you really are? There are a ton of illusions that shape our lives. We don't see them because they are illusions. We often work to keep them intact so that we don't have to deal with the fall out of what it means to not have them, since they can be the guides and borders of our lives!
This is why when some upsetting oddity happens in a community everyone is stunned and then rushes to create laws and rules to avoid having a similar oddity happen again. The group illusions were shattered about the "safe society" and thus we need to somehow recreate and develop a way for our illusions to be maintained so that we can sleep at night. That simple. So look at your illusions — they are more powerful than you think because you are unaware of them — the most powerful opponent is the one you refuse to even admit exists.
Next look at what you are afraid of experiencing. is it a sense of loneliness? Of isolation? Of having to speak up? Or perhaps it is simply a fear of experiencing change? Every decision brings with it a variety of experiences, not all which we are going to perceive as pleasant. And some we may perceive as downright unwanted.
Once you've examined one choice as fully as possible, then examine the others. And when you are done, you may have a greater understanding of why you are stalled, why you are not going forward and why you are shuffling your feet instead of choosing a direction to move towards .
And by doing this we may develop a deeper understanding of what we are seeking from whatever ultimate decision we end up making. And that is the greater gift — to more fully understand what it is we truly want and what it is we are truly trying to create in our lives. By knowing ourself more fully and completely, we can become that much more focused on where it is we are ultimately trying to get to.
The added bonus of this is that when things are difficult or challenging, then we have a greater degree of authenticity to draw upon. A greater understanding of what is that is affecting our motivations and choices. And this can then help us make more empowered choices when we are under stress and perhaps not seeing our empowerment completely as we might need to see it.
© Rich See 2010